Dating the Dude with Undesirable Duds

Dear KK, I love to get gussied up! And my man?.... Well, no matter where we are he is fine to stroll around in a baseball cap and flip flops. While I don’t want to change who he is, I am a little embarrassed at times that his wardrobe is “sub par” for the fashion conditions. Any suggestions on how I can remedy my fashion faux pas loving man?                           --Dating the Dude with Undesirable Duds Dear D (I thought I would shorten that mouthful!) Do not fret! This is an issue that has plagued relationships from the dawn of man. I am sure even our fore sisters “the cave ladies” were not exactly thrilled about their man’s choice of wardrobe back in the day.
		But the important thing to remember here is you must not insult or attack someone for their style choice. I am a firm believer that the majority of people out there today are unaware of their options. They open a magazine or see their spouse for the that matter reading a magazine and think, “That’s not me!” So since they can’t relate they close the door on fashion all together.
You have to find a way to meld your man’s style into a fashionable choice. OPEN HIS EYES... to all fashion. I am guessing he is the type of guy who sees jeans as a uniform. And you know what, unless you are going to a black tie affair that is A OK!!! Because now-a-days, even jeans have dress up options. What about finding a retro looking sports jacket at a thrift store? Pairing that with a cool tee and jeans can dress your man up without making him feel you’re trying to “make him over”. As far as shoes go I say take your man to “Nordstrom Rack”. I had a similar issue with my husband... it got to the point where me or the smelly birkenstocks from his college years had to go.... so one day I stopped arguing and said, “Hey, today is Brian day... I am taking you shopping.” I cut him loose in Nordstom Rack and together we tried on 50 pairs of very affordable shoes. We laughed, we joked, and in the end he fell in love with a pair of dress shoes believe it or not that turned out to be totally his style. but never once in the process did I FORCE him to try something.
I made the process fun for him and I kept complimenting his “laid back” approach to fashion and in the end we were both satisfied. A couple who can shop together is a happy couple, trust me. So to make it simple here is my advice to you.
			1.) Comprimise. You like to dress up, he likes to dress down. Find a middle ground with him that allows him to be himself and still makes you feel comfortable. For example: Let him keep his jeans and T-shirt but he has to lose the flip-flops and wear a sports coat over his ensemble. My fun ways to “gussy” up his looks.
2.) Open His Eyes to Options. Clearly your man’s top priority is not fashion so maybe he is not aware of what’s out there. A Taxi Cab hat or a Fedora for example can be super fun dress up options for a man who likes to beat to a different drum than GQ. Take him to a thrift store. If he doesn’t like to spend money on clothes you have to respect that especially in this economy. Show him ways he never thought of to shop.
	3.) Communicate. A lot of men don’t know you’re not suppose to wear “open toed shoes” to this event, or a baseball cap inside. Explain to him kindly that it is not appropriate in some situations. He honestly probably had no clue. And if you are embarrassed maybe explain to him why you feel really good about yourself when you dress up and that sometimes when he dresses down after you spent hours getting ready it hurts your feelings. Make it about how YOU feel, not about HIM and who he is.
Everyone has the right to express themselves. Your man is a great big canvas and he has the brushes you just need to give him the paint! Together I am sure you will make a master piece! KK

Comments

[Fashion Bug Coupons Chick]

Comprimise is the key as you stated.